Most first consultations are 60 minutes. Some are 30. A few attorneys charge by the quarter hour from the moment you sit down. Walk in unprepared and that hour goes to background. Walk in prepared and you leave with a strategy, a price range, and a clearer head than you’ve had in weeks.
Here’s what to gather, what to ask, and what to come clean about — so the meeting actually moves things forward.
What to bring
You don’t need every document on day one. You need enough to give the attorney a real picture of your finances and your situation. A two-inch binder is overkill. A single folder with the basics is exactly right.
- Last 2 years of tax returns — both personal and any business returns
- Recent pay stubs for both spouses, if you can access them
- A snapshot of every account: balances on checking, savings, brokerage, retirement
- Mortgage statement, lease, or deed for any property you own together
- Current statements for credit cards, car loans, student loans, and any joint debt
- A short written timeline of the marriage — date married, date of separation if any, names and ages of children
- Any existing legal paperwork — prenup, postnup, prior court orders, protective orders
If your spouse controls the finances and you can’t access these, say so. Don’t guess at numbers. An honest "I don’t know yet" is more useful than a wrong figure.
What to ask
You’re also interviewing them. Most attorneys expect this. A good one will welcome the questions because it tells them you’ll be a prepared client.
- How many divorces like mine have you handled in the last year?
- What’s your hourly rate, your retainer, and your billing increment?
- Who else in your office will work on my case — paralegals, associates — and what do they bill at?
- How quickly do you typically return calls and emails?
- Given what I’ve told you, what’s a realistic timeline and total cost range?
- Do you push for settlement or for litigation when the case allows either?
- What would you need from me in the next 30 days to move forward?
Write down the answers. After two or three consultations the conversations blur together, and the differences are what help you choose.
What to be honest about
This part matters more than the documents. Attorney-client privilege starts the moment you sit down, even if you don’t hire them. Tell them the things you’d rather not say out loud — the affair, the hidden account, the credit card you opened in your name only, the text messages you regret sending. Surprises in court are how cases get lost. Surprises in the consultation are how attorneys build a real strategy.
Same goes for the kids. Custody preferences, scheduling concerns, anything about safety or substance use — mention it on day one.
What to do after
Before you leave, ask for the engagement letter and the retainer agreement to review at home. Don’t sign in the room. Take 24 hours.
The Divorce Attorney Preparation Checklist in Lumeway’s Divorce bundle walks you through every document to gather, every question to ask, and a place to score each consultation against the next. It’s designed to ride along in the folder you bring to the meeting.
Preparing for divorce? Lumeway’s Divorce bundle includes the attorney prep checklist, asset and property inventory worksheet, joint account separation letter, and post-divorce financial reset checklist — all editable in Google Docs or Word.
A prepared hour is worth three unprepared ones. Bring the folder. Ask the questions. Sleep on the contract.
This post is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute legal, financial, or tax advice. Divorce procedures, document requirements, and attorney fee structures vary by state and by firm. Consult a licensed family law attorney for guidance specific to your situation.